Confused But Relaxed

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After getting out of Vipassana, I feel like I got in a weird zone in terms of feelings. I felt like a robot since I was accustomed to meditating for 10 hours a day. I think I just reset and started feeling empty again and without purpose which is nice but a bit strange while backpacking.

Right now I'm in Mexico City taking a break from hitchhiking. I took two buses recently which isn't very normal for me, but I don't feel like hitchhiking at the moment. Why? Well, for starters, the transport system is very good here around the city. I would spend the same money buying water and getting food while I'm hitchhiking. So taking a cheap bus is convenient for now.

Recently I also felt super attached to this girl that was my host in the north and I learned new things about her that made me realize that sometimes, it's best to let everything take its course naturally.

Change of plans

I was supposed to go back to the state of San Luis Potosí, but I decided to continue my trip south because I feel like I need to spend more time alone. It wouldn't be healthy for me to go back to see this girl for my selfish reasons. There's also this thing where I saw all her traumas reveal themselves recently which makes me feel like she's not ready to work on them. And well it's not on me to force her to heal if she doesn't want to.

So at this point I really don't have a plan, but I think I'll spend my last month in Oaxaca City where the nature is beautiful, I can do magic mushrooms ceremonies and I can meet other backpackers and get to know some people a little deeper.

I plan on using a website called workaway to find a job that will pay me in return with accommodation and food. And that's what's up. I'm a bit tired of traveling honestly, and I think it's because I'm bored with Mexican culture, and it's all starting to become predictable. I think I need a change of environment. Maybe a new country would be perfect right about now.


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